One day, I came across a letter in one of my mum\u2019s books. The letter was from one of her sister asking her to abort me since she was divorced and pregnant. After reading the letter, I felt a sharp pain in my heart. \u00a0It all made sense now, I WAS NOT MEANT TO BE HERE!<\/p>\n
Growing up, I really envied kids with dads. I was always uncomfortable, even when my friends\u2019 dads got close to me. All I could project was my rejection.<\/p>\n
I<\/em><\/strong> forgot that you cannot run forward if you keep looking back.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n I had a mind block of trying to please people with the intent for them to like me in return. Trust me when I say it was really hard.<\/p>\n Seeking peoples\u2019 validation can never be the solution to rejection.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n I cried several nights wishing I had a dad. Memories of him were few. I believed life would have been easier and better if he was around. He would have defended me and conquered feats for me, so I thought. I was affected, but it never reflected on the outside.<\/p>\n You don\u2019t have to limit your future merely because of voids in your past.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n It was hard to close those chapters and write new ones.<\/p>\n I was a withdrawn child and people just assumed it is my nature. I was never vulnerable and I shy away from conversations. My mind was always busy. I devoted my energy into whatever that would keep me busy from myself.<\/p>\n You will miss your next assignment in life if you worship the past and yearn for yesterday. Let it go!<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n I received Christ but it was hard receiving him as a father. I had questions. I asked questions. I needed my hardened heart to be tender towards him. Then, I realized he came through for me at every point in my life. I started reading his word.<\/p>\n I found out he has chosen me. He sets the solitary in families and I wasn’t born a mistake. I am accepted in the beloved and he has loved me with an everlasting love.<\/p>\n Even though I never experienced firsthand the love of an earthly father, I recaptured all that I lost when I got to know my heavenly father.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n In as much as I found out these truths, I started reading books and attending programs to deal with the root causes and the memories of an absent father. I found my identity in Christ. I am still on this journey and its been a progressive one at that.<\/p>\n Sis, for the many changes you will face on all levels of life, I recommend Jesus\u2026 He is our father<\/em><\/strong> before we ever had an earthly one.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n Love you<\/p>\n Xoxo<\/p>\n Christy<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" One day, I came across a letter in one of my mum\u2019s books. The letter was from one of her sister asking her to abort me since she was divorced and pregnant. After reading the letter, I felt a sharp pain in my heart. \u00a0It all made sense now, I WAS NOT MEANT TO BE HERE! Growing up, I really…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1239,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[71],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/thephenomenalwoman.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Absent-father-e1592245258684.jpg","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\n